There are 3 quite good Irish ‘leaving the chapel’ jokes, one with two men, two with two women

1. The PP is obviously suffering from Alzheimer’s: every sermon for years ,whatever the start, has moved to the parable of ‘A men went up to the temple to pray’. One man says to the other: ‘It was a dam bad day for this parish when that man went up to pray’
2. Two old biddies leaving a special service to pray for the canonisation of Blessed Martin Porres. One says to the other: ‘It’s just like the town council; once they’re in, they forget all about you’.
3. Possibly the same two, leaving the after a mission sermon on marriage : ‘I wish I knew as little about it as him’
We write shortly after the Feast of Sts Peter and Paul, a date on which all over the world many ordinations took place. These were not of seasoned veterans of a lifetime , battered , bloody but far from unbowed by the vagaries of our existence, eye narrowed with experience and its corollary caution, not cynical but constantly struggling to avoid being so. These were 25 year olds who had spent the previous 6 years insulated and isolated in a seminary. And we loved them! Parishioners fought to receive their blessing, a phenomenon which deserves actually another blog. Age meant nothing!
And looking at the Church just now, and at some of its cardinals in particular, we are reminded of the two old ladies and the sermon on marriage.
What does a 75 year plus cardinal k now about life as a young married Catholic with a young family ? What did they ever know about it?
Let’s look at the three cardinals making the news this month. Cardinal Sarah – of whom a little goes a long way, in our opinion- appears again. You’ll remember that he wants us to attend mass pointing in a particular point of the compass. Cardinal Tagle of the Philippines-`usually reasonably sensible- wants priests to stop beginning Mass by saying ‘Good morning’ to the congregation. To be fair, we get his point, but how many parishes in the Philippines are without priests?
And of course, there’s Cardinal Pell. We may be wrong here-perhaps someone can enlighten us- but was not Cardinal Pell a member of the ‘why can’t they just make a spiritual communion?’ school before Pope Francis was elected. We may be wrong; enlighten us. At any rate, we suggest looking at last week’s ‘Tablet’ and making up your mind about exactly what Cardinal Pell’s relationship to the Last Supper may be.
For some reason we have been distracted even as we type by the interesting concept of the collective noun. Is there one for clowns?
As the millions of disenchanted Catholics, especially those bringing up a young family- or those who can be bothered today- look on and wonder what the hell is happening, one asks what would be so bad about appointing to govern the Church cardinals who are in their thirties or maybe an occasional one in his twenties- you know, people in touch with everyday life?
But perhaps some day soon the Pope’s next cohort of new cardinals may be in their thirties. Remembering how we greeted the young priests, can this do any harm? You know, having the Church governed by people who actually live in 2017 ?
Organising a party is difficult. Organising a champagne party can be more difficult. Organising a champagne party on a world-wide scale might present problems, but what a night it would be!